Tuesday, July 25, 2006

PPB - Post Pilgrimage Blues

19th July: Missing all of you........, the walking etc etc ...

20th July:
I feel flat (do..do..do..do..do..do..doo)
Tho' I'm pleased to be back (do..do..do..do..do..do..doo)
No boots, no backpack (do..do..do..do..do..do..doo)
I feel flat.
Nowhere to roam
I feel alone
I feel flat (do..do..do..do..do..do..doo)

21st July: Yes - I was also a bit flat and was uncharacteristically mizzie yesterday ..... but feeling better today.

21st: Thank you all for an amazing experience, I have to say, I have found being at home and surrounded by so much "stuff" really offputting, I think I am going to get rid of lots!

24th July: WEll girls, I was a little relieved to hear that you all are feeling odd...I have honestly felt so down that I couldn't bring myself to phone friends or even go onto my e mail. I looked around my home with all the trappings of life and could have picked up my backpack and just started walking...all I wanted to do was sit and read our blog which I could not print off on my useless computer at home. Back to work and feel trapped!

24th July: I'm at work and want to just pick up my backpack, collect all of you and start walking,,,missing you all - what have we done to ourselves?

24th July: Eish!! I can definitely not be at work. Think I can even do a 10hour walk today!! Think I need a coffee break together!

25th July: I think I am sick. I knew it was coming 'cos I just wanted to sleep all the time.
Now I have a hot face and coughed an snotted all night. How can you walk outdoors all day, get hotter than hot, walk in rain, eat bread, custard slices and coke for breakfast - and not get sick?
Then you come home, fruit for breakfast, salad lunch, veg curry for dinner, stay indoors, sleep until 7h30 - and get sick.

24th July: I have the worst stomach...it is gurgling and upset all the time, I have no energy.....I need Italy....sorry to hear you are not well.

25th July am: How are you feeling...I just cannot get into work...I fear I will never be any good...I can honestly say that if the circumstances were different I could happily get up and just walk out now...what has this holiday done to me?

25th July pm: I am sick. I am tired. I am listless. I am not a weepy wailer but feel almost constantly on the verge of wailing. I don't think I could walk 3kms if someone paid me to. And I don't care.

..... The cure for Post-Pilgrim-blues:

Fr Frank (speaking about the camino pilgrimage):
"Many people report feeling sad, alone and down after their Camino experience. The initial return to daily life brings a certain excitement and an eagerness to share the experience with others. When the pictures are developed there is another wave of outpouring of Camino excitement and for some, the opportunity to give a talk or write an article. But then slowly it begins to dawn that the Camino is over. That carefree existence, where one’s greatest pain was a foot blister and among one’s greatest delights was photographing a snail crossing the road, is over.
Now we have to deal with all the usual problems - and our loved ones soon tire of hearing our stories. Although we pilgrims console one another with the agreed-upon wisdom that the ‘Camino never ends - it continues in daily life’, deep down we know that something has ended. Feelings of loss, longing and emptiness begin to surface. Does this strike a chord with you? You could be suffering from the post-pilgrimage blues.
What then is the remedy for the post-Camino blues? What about seeing every new day as a pilgrimage? As we walk into each day we are walking as into a foreign land; we are going beyond our experience. Live as a pilgrim, in the present moment, carrying only what you really need, leaving behind excess baggage, expecting nothing and grateful for everything, open to new experiences, aware of all that is! Then every road will be a Camino and every stopping-place a refugio and those post-Camino blues will give way to greens and reds and yellows!
FdeG@ananzi.co.za

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